Employee Assistance Program: Dealing with Grief and Other Issues
Responses to Grieving, Loss, and Trauma
-Information provided by the
Family & Children's Service of Ithaca, NY
Grieving is a deeply personal process that everyone moves through when a significant loss has been sustained. Individuals who experience the loss of someone or something they love go through a grieving cycle. Each moves through the cycle at his/ her own pace, in his/ her own time.
The intensity and duration of the grieving process varies from individual to individual. Factors that influence the intensity and duration of the grieving process include:
- The individual's age and developmental stage at time of the loss
- The importance or significance that the individual places on the someone or something lost
- The number of previous real or perceived losses or separations that the individual has experienced
- The individual's degree of emotional or psychological vulnerability
- The quality and availability of the individual's personal support system
- The individual's cultural and religious beliefs
Reaction to a loss or traumatic event may be delayed. All reactions are NORMAL. Some individuals may have no reaction at all; this too is NORMAL. Generally, however, individuals may experience one or more of the following reactions or symptoms of stress at some point during and throughout the grieving process. If symptoms are severe, persistent, concerning or debilitating, professional assistance should be sought.
| Possible Emotional Responses |
Possible |
Possible |
| Denial Mood Swings "Moodiness" Sadness/ Despair Anger (toward self, current significant others or caretakers, the lost someone or something or God) Anxiety Worry Fearfulness Irritability Guilt Abandonment Rejection Loneliness Isolation Vulnerability Longing Apathy Confusion Numbness Emptiness Distrust of Others Feeling of Unreality Fear of losing control, "going crazy" (i.e. crying, yelling and not being able to stop) Fear of own death, death of loved ones or future losses *Suicidal Thoughts or Feelings *Disassociation or Flashbacks *Psychotic Thinking (i.e. visual or auditory hallucinations, poor reality testing, etc.) |
Increased Dependency |
Change
of Appetite (increase or decrease) Poor Sleep (difficult falling asleep, frequent waking, early morning waking with inability to fall back to sleep) Unsettling or Disturbing Dreams or Nightmares Shortness of Breath Tightness in Throat Headaches Chest Pain "Heartache" "Pounding" or "Heaviness" in Chest Stomach Upset (Stomach Ache, Nausea) "Nervousness" "Butterflies in Stomach" "Antsy-ness" Fatigue Muscle Tightness, Inability to Relax Fleeting Muscle, Joint Aches and Pains |
For help with these issues, Cornell staff, faculty, and retirees are urged to call the EAP at 255-1531 for more information or to set up an appointment.