Employee Assistance Program: Dealing with Grief and Other Issues
When Disaster Strikes: What to Tell Your Children
-Information provided by the
Family & Children's Service of Ithaca, NY
Find out what and how much they know. Correct any information about the event with actual facts. Be sure to explain the facts to them at a level they can understand and is age appropriate. If you need help determining what is age appropriate information, please ask you child's school or other community resources (such as your EAP, Clergy, Pediatrician etc) for guidance.
Limit their exposure to the media. Instead, try to increase your interaction with them. Try to sensor what they see, especially any graphic material about the event.
Continue their routines. There is a sense of safety and predictability that is established by having a routine.
If they are questioning safety, try to reassure them that everyone is trying to keep them safe.
Let them know you are there for them, and will be there for them.
A sense of community is very important. Avoid isolation.
Encourage them to talk about their feelings about the disaster. They may need to tell and re-tell the story. They may also play out the event. This is normal.
If you and your relatives are safe, communicate that to your children. Communicate that you are lucky and what has happened is awful, that there is no way to really explain this.
Do not communicate a sense of hopelessness and helplessness.
Their view of the situation will be affected by your feelings and
actions.
For help with these issues, Cornell staff, faculty, and retirees are urged to call the EAP at 255-1531 for more information or to set up an appointment.